As the stay-at-home orders continued to be pushed back and it became a real possibility that I wouldn’t get to go back to school to finish senior year in the traditional way, I started to ask myself why this is happening to the world. I was aware of how it was affecting other people and how it could be much worse for me and my family, but I allowed myself to feel angry and sad. I was frustrated that the rest of my high school experience would be spent in my home. I was upset that all the rites of passage weren’t going to happen or that they wouldn’t be the same. But with these emotions came the question of what is the reason behind this happening. I forced myself to really think this over, to open myself up to accepting what was happening.
Being home since March and doing online learning has caused a series of up and down emotions almost every day. Some days I’m in favor of not having to wake up at 6 AM every morning, doing things according to my own schedule, and logging into Zoom classes. Other days, however, I miss things like driving to school in the morning with my brother, walking through the halls, and chatting with my friends. More often than not, I miss all the traditions that I had been looking forward to since freshman year. Senior sunset, decision day, senior slideshow, writing the college we were going on the glass in front of the counselors’ office, and dance concert all became things that couldn’t and wouldn’t happen anymore – at least in the traditional sense.
I have always heard that by the end of senior year, everyone usually becomes friends with one another and that they become closer than they were before. When I found out that the seniors in my class would be ending the year at home, I thought about how we wouldn’t get the opportunity to end the year in this way, that we would have to end the year as individuals instead. However, I soon realized that we have all gotten closer in a different way because we are all going through this new unfamiliar situation together. I know that I will always remember my classmates because we are getting through this and will graduate despite all that has happened.