My name is Victor. Something important about me is that I’m really funny, nice, smart, and friendly. My family was born in a small country named Ecuador. I lived only in one neighborhood in New York called Sunset Park. I have been to only two schools. The first one is PS24 and the second one is PSC. When I was about ten years old I was practicing how to ride a bike every day. Some days I hurt myself by riding too much. But in the three week of practicing I finally learned how to ride the bike and it was really fun and exciting that I used my bike every day.
In school I like to do my work and help other students if they need help. And I like talking to my friends and playing with them because it’s really fun. In school I’m good at ELA, Spanish, Social Studies, and some math because it’s kind of hard. I enjoy being at school because I can make new friends and new teachers and hang out with my friends. I’m good at Spanish because it’s really easy and I can get one hundred. And I was raised speaking Spanish because my Mom and Dad taught me when I was young. When I was five I went to school and I was learning how to speak English and I’m really good at speaking it. My greatest struggle in life is making new friends because I want to hang out with them.
My family is from Ecuador and the person I love most is my Mom and my Dad because they are always right there for me when I’m in trouble or need help with homework. I’m lucky to have the strongest and smartest family in the world because they are all nice.
I noticed that there was a lot of redundancy within this writing. It’s important to bring up a topic, explain it, and move on to the next rather than bringing up the same topic again and again. It’s also important to give your sentences more meaning and setting up different structures for each. A lot of your sentences followed the same flow which made this writing a little uninteresting at some parts. I noticed that your structure seemed very similar to your other classmates and would say it is important to be different within your writing. I did like learning about your life however, and hope to read more from you in the future.