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Laila
April 5, 2024 1:38 pm

Without a doubt, this is an extremely powerful text and highlights the prolonged police brutality and mass incarceration issues that have been embedded into our system. I believe that if you just re-read and revise this text, this could become an even more powerful message that could have a voice in this world. Why did you choose to write this?

Bobbie
April 4, 2024 2:10 pm

The writing provides a powerful personal perspective on the tragedy of police brutality and mass incarceration through your connection to Khalil. However, some sections are very detailed and can kind of dilute the core message. Tightening the focus on your key arguments and calls to action could make this writing even more impactful.

December 12, 2023 10:32 pm

Dear DeVante,

Your post made me think that the police officers should’ve been held accountable for those actions. It also made me think that you could connect all of this information to your personal life. Something I wonder is that, why do some officers still have some hatred towards colored people in the United States.

Sincerely,
Bryan

Nathanael
May 19, 2023 2:53 pm

I agree that cops should be held accountable and I like how you made it personal because this is a big issue that we need to come together to fix because it will be hard to change

Uthman
March 24, 2023 12:04 am

I agree with the sentmate and overall even though it wasn’t super long I think it got the points that it needed too

Khayla
March 23, 2023 10:59 pm

I wholeheartedly concur with your position, and I appreciate how you used personal examples to strengthen your case. What steps should we take to address this problem and try to find a solution, in your opinion?

Saifeddine
March 23, 2023 3:34 am

I love how you connected a lot of info into your own life experience. do you think that people like you feel the same persecution

March 23, 2023 3:17 am

Lots of connections to your own life. Very great work.

Ebenezer
March 23, 2023 12:38 am

I love the passion that you shared with us

Last edited 1 year ago by Ebenezer
Christopher S
March 23, 2023 12:00 am

DeVante, I appreciate you sharing your personal experience with us. I’m sorry you’ve experienced that, but I want to take the time to commend you for using this platform as a way to convey your perspective on police brutality and gun violence.

Nejat
March 22, 2023 11:45 pm

DeVante,

You have great key points about your friend story and the lack of training competition for cops and how it connects with the story your are telling us. I want to ask you, what do you think the method should be in order to change the incomplete training of police officers.

Sabria
March 22, 2023 11:23 pm

I love how you added your personal views to your post. It really brings character to your perspective, and enhances the story.

Makema
March 22, 2023 11:23 pm

The way you put it really highlights how understanding the administration has been of police officers. One out of every ten people failed in judgment, costing Khalil his life. The connections that you made to your personal life defiantly gave me a better understanding of your points.

Isaiah
March 22, 2023 10:54 pm

Akeem
I really appreciate the stance you have taken for this assignment, in particular the piece that speaks on the incompetence of police training. Not to ramble here, but the way you described it really emphasizes just how forgiving the government has been towards cops. One-Fifth ten has make a mistake in judgement that costed the life of Khalil. If a surgeon did the same exact thing and mistakenly took another person’s life, I would bet he would spend the rest of his life in jail. Which makes your sentiment about training police officers more effectively so they don’t make these grave mistakes that cause tragedies.

With that being said, justice is a feeble thing in the law enforcement system, and we’ve rarely seen the full extent of justice being served to officers who have committed wrongdoings, non-fatal or fatal. How impactful would it be to introduce new legislation that punished officers unforgivingly for their wrong-doings? How would it reduce or perhaps increase shootings like these?

Overall, amazing post, thanks for sharing!

Shanih
March 22, 2023 8:36 pm

I fully agree with your position, and I like how you used personal examples to further your case. Your personal connections shows how much of an issue it is in the world with it happens to one of your dear friends. 

Faith H
March 22, 2023 4:35 pm

I completely agree with your stance and like how you incorporated personal connections, it really made the argument stronger. How do you think we move forward with this situation and attempt to resolve it?

Joelle
March 22, 2023 2:59 pm

I like how you made personal connections to your own life and how it has affected you

Brandon
March 22, 2023 2:44 pm

I like how you connected it to your own life

Youth Voices is an open publishing and social networking platform for youth. The site is organized by teachers with support from the National Writing Project. Opinions expressed by writers are their own.  See more About Youth VoicesTerms of ServicePrivacy Policy.All work on Youth Voices is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 4.0 International License

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