I kept asking myself,

Why did my parents divorce?

Weren’t we going to be the perfect family?

Time passed and my father left

He left to Mexico

Why?

Another bump in my road

Why did he leave?

When is the next time I’ll see him?

He said he would be there

when I needed him,

But he was not.

I started to have resentment on him

Even if I didn’t want to

There was something in me

That didn’t allow me to see him as a

“Father”

I had mixed emotions

I was sad

I was upset

I was ANGRY

I stopped talking to him for years.

My mother had finally convinced me to talk to him

I called

He was in the hospital

I wouldn’t have known if I had not called.

I realized that not talking to my dad was not right.

I thought,

If something happens to happens to him

I wouldn’t forgive myself.

A couple years passed by   

And I finally had the courage to go see him in mexico,

I had different expectations for the trip.

When I got there,

He didn’t even go pick me up

It was his driver.

And it was not because he was sick,

It was because he preferred work instead of me.

I let that one go,

The next 2-3 days passed by

I didn’t see him because he was out of town with his family.

Yeah that was a rough time for me

I wish he would have at least invited me

So I can spend time with him and his family.

On my last day in Mexico

I saw him,

I wasn’t too happy to see him, but

He apologized for everything he had done,

I accepted his apology

Because,

He is my dad.

And I was glad that he was fine, in terms of health.

Although me and my dad don’t have have best relationship,

We know we will always be there for each other.

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CC BY-SA 4.0 Unexpected by Jocelin is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 4.0 International License.

3 Comments
  1. Yahaira 4 months ago

    Dear Jocelin,
    I enjoyed reading your memoir because it is something personal and I can also relate to it. I’m glad that you were able to open up and let us know about a difficult time in your life. I can relate to so many things written down in this memoir. Some lines that stood out to me were,”If something happens to him I wouldn’t forgive myself.” This stood out to me because I also don’t talk to my dad and I know it’s not right but I have resentment for all he has done but at the end he’s my dad and I wouldn’t want something to happen to him. I feel like there’s a lot that we can relate in. Thanks for your writing about this because just like me, there’s probably others that can also relate to you. I’ll be looking forward to more of your posts.
    -yahaira

  2. Stephanie 4 months ago

    Hi Joce,

    I loved your poem. I think it is super strong and well written. I liked that you were able to open up and talk about a time that was difficult and how you handled that. The part that stood out to me the most was the part where you took initiative and called your dad then visited him even if it wasn’t as planned. It says a lot about who you are are your values. This is a great story Jocelin.

    Thank for sharing!

    Love,
    Chata

  3. Kadijah 4 months ago

    Jocelin,
    I enjoyed reading your memoir, you have a lot of emotions going on and you were brave enough to talk about it and sharing it with an audience it’s probably hard for you that you can’t see your dad as much and that sucks because you really wanted to spend time with him, the part when you said that you accepted his apology it shows a strong impact on you because it shows that you are a forgiving person. Good Job!

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