Trust is reliance on the integrity, strength, and ability of a person or thing. “Trust lies at the core of all our relationships and it is the currency of influence,” Margie Warrell says, a writer for Forbes. According to Warrell there are three domains of trust: competence, sincerity, and reliability. Competence is asking yourself if one is deserving of your trust because of their skills, experience, knowledge, and proper resources to perform a task. Reliability is the ability to depend on someone to follow through on their word of completing a task on time. Lastly, sincerity is based on a judgement of character and fundamental integrity; it is asking yourself if that person will do the right thing, even if it comes at an expense. The reason we trust is because of our experiences, who we are as individuals, and how we learned to treat people we have met previously. We learn how to trust by our positive and negative experiences of betrayal and loyalty, and those experiences reshaped our specific expectations for trusting others. Because of that, we are always either bent towards or away from trust in differing situations. Judith Sills, an irrational expertise for Psychology Today, explains that “trust — whether in a person or a product — is more than a compilation of information and experience. It is that data squeezed through some individual emotional filter, invisible to the eye yet active in every encounter.” As teenagers, we are still in the deep midst of discovering how to trust. Every experience with every person we encounter develops our expectations for trusting others. We make grave trusting mistakes which teach us how to better trust other people in our future, like our future bosses, future friends, and future soul mate(s). The reason we trust so easy in our life is because it takes a lot of work for us to truly not trust an individual, and then act on that lack of trust. And the reason we do not trust demonstrably untrustworthy people comes from our default tendency to do so.

CC BY-SA 4.0 Trusting by Mia is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 4.0 International License.

5 Comments
  1. Judge Thomas 2 months ago

    Mia,
    I too believe that trust is a concept that must be approached with sincere thought. Trust, in my opinion, is a key aspect for the development of ideas and processes which are addressed by others in a way to make productive use of those ideas. Unfortunately, there are some individuals that are brought up, or experience mistrusting behavior from adults like guardians. There will be a point in out lives, if not now, when we see some of the flaws in our parents present or past behavior. This alters our view on the role model they should or are expected to set. A book that really proves this point is The Road, by Cormac McCarthy. Toward the end of the book and even at parts in the middle section, the boy starts to realize the inevitable truth of the world and what the purpose of his and his father’s trip is. When the father tries to assure and comfort the boy that everything will be ok and that they will seek a safe place soon is eventually discovered by the boy that this may not be the truth. As we mature, Mia, there are times when we look at our parents and find the flaws pertaining to their image. However, because we are human, we cannot hold their flaws in the chains of our ignorance.

    Now that we can analyze this trust among parents, we can give or receive insight that making trustful relations in high school are difficult especially when we do not fully trust people. On the other hand, we can look at this and say that we are all in the same boat and that we can acknowledge the struggle to trust people, especially in high school. This in turn makes trusting someone in high school difficult. When we find the right group of friends, we give a part of ourselves to them if we really like them. This, I would say, is the first step to and for trust; testing the waters of a relationship by giving a small part of ourselves to the person or group of people and see how they work with that peace of us. If they take care of that piece we can give a little more until it is a circulation of trust with which they give too. I really like this post and is very important that people understand the value of true trust and reliance on another.

    Your friend,

    T.

  2. Bobby 3 months ago

    Dear Mia,
    This is a very interesting post. As I have decided to trust and not trust people in the past, I have never thought of the deeper reasons for why I trust people. For exampe, I would say I trust people more on sincerity rather than competency or reliability, even through I decide to trust people on that as well. Webster Dictionary’s definition (https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/trust) defines trust as assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something, but I like your definition better. I like that quote from Margie Warrell, as that defines how I use trust as well, “Trust lies at the core of all our relationships and it is the currency of influence,”, that defines how I use trust a lot.

    From,
    Bobby

  3. Sophia 4 months ago

    Mia,
    I am very interested in your post on trust. The three forms of trust are very structured and teach a lot to the reader, not only about the concept itself, but how you define it and what role it plays in your life. The part that I love is when you say, “We learn how to trust by our positive and negative experiences of betrayal and loyalty, and those experiences reshaped our specific expectations for trusting others.” I was intrigued by this, because it brought the reader (myself) back to how trust is so dependent on personal experiences. There have been many times in my life where my trust in someone has been betrayed, especially in high school. There are also many times when someone has shown me more trust or honored my trust more than I could ever expect/imagine. Thank you for sharing your insight in this well-writen post, and teaching me about a concept that is so difficult to understand. Here is a link I am required to put into my comment! It is an in-depth perspective of trust and the thing that are affected by it and caused by it: http://changingminds.org/explanations/trust/what_is_trust.htm .

    Sincerely,
    Sophia Gross

  4. Javier 4 months ago

    Dear Mia,
    I am very interested by you post “Trusting” because, this issue is relatable as to how people really do treat each other and how trust is a very tough thing to come across or experience. Throughout your post you had me interested especially when you include lines like “The reason we trust is because of our experiences, who we are as individuals, and how we learned to treat people we have met previously. We learn how to trust by our positive and negative experiences of betrayal and loyalty, and those experiences reshaped our specific expectations for trusting others.” I thought this was interesting because, the way our psychology works, we really do trust based off our experiences and who we associated with at a younger age. Your post hits home with me, I was put in some terrible situations because, of who I trusted or who I thought had my back. As a result, trust is very important and valuable to me because, it’s hard to come by nowadays. Thanks for your writing. I look forward to seeing what you write next because I feel like I can relate to it through the experiences I’ve been through and who I’ve associated with.

  5. Sara 4 months ago

    Mia,
    This is a very interesting topic to take an interest in. I learned a lot from this post, especially the part about there being three different forms of trust. This is interesting because when we think about trust we don’t really seem to go into great depth about it. My favorite part was when you related it to your readers by saying, “As teenagers, we are still in the deep midst of discovering how to trust. Every experience with every person we encounter develops our expectations for trusting others.” This was great because it drew me back into connecting with everything stated above and below it. I am still in high school and there are still moments when I think I trust people, but then something happens and I start to question it. Thank you for teaching me more about trust and that there is more to it than just a simple gut feeling.

    Sincerely,
    Sara Bachmeier

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