Dear Youth Voices Community,

Hi my name is Jose Pacheco and I am a senior in Fremont High School in the media academy.My topic for my senior project is about child labor in the us in the past and curintly and my solution is to make sure that this dosent happen to any child.

This is my current thesis statement:

The problem of my subject is that the big companies and government were taking advantage of kids and letting them to work for hours and hours.There were no laws against child labor and no laws of how to protect them from companies to take advantage of them.Solution is to make child labor laws to be more forced towards the companies and that the penalty to be more harsh like instead of 5 years in jail it could be like 30 years for braking the child labor laws.

Fremont High School seniors are now writing preliminary thesis statements to help guide how they read their sources. I would greatly appreciate your feedback and help on my preliminary thesis statement. If you could score my thesis statement using this rubric, that would be even more helpful!!!


Jose Pacheco

Fremont High School

CC BY-SA 4.0 How do I Fix My Thesis? by jose is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 4.0 International License.

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